Individual Therapy
When your comfort zone is no longer comfortable…
You’re about to have your first therapy appointment. You feel ridiculous. Beneath that, you feel scared. You have no idea what is going to happen. It’s hard to breathe…
You start thinking about what’s going to happen when the appointment is over. You know your partner is having a tough day today and that they’ll need you. You want to be supportive and understanding, but you feel like you’re just not going to be able to be fully present – you’re afraid of either saying the wrong thing or saying anything at all, because you’ll get it wrong.
“But that’s stupid! Why can’t I just show up? It’s not like this is hard! All I have to do is listen!”
But it doesn’t feel like all you have to do is listen. It doesn’t feel easy to listen. You feel like you won’t be able to be there ‘enough’ for them. You know you’re going to get stuck in your head, again.
“Whenever I feel like they need me to be there for them, I choke! It’s no longer comfortable.”
It’s not a passing feeling.
This same feeling shows up all the time. Not just in your relationship with your partner, but with your parents, your closest friends.
You find it scary to show up for yourself. You can’t remember the last time you followed through with your promise to yourself to spend time being still or looking into what scares you.
It doesn’t feel safe to be in your own skin, especially when what you want most in the world is to feel connected, not just to others, but inside.
Running away from your feelings is futile.
And, you know it’s no longer alright to keep running from yourself.
You know that if you turn away from your feelings again, if you keep pushing them away, your relationship may end, and that feels very scary.
As you look at the clock, you see it’s five minutes before your appointment starts. A thought comes to you: “Am I making too much of how I’m feeling? I know I’m blowing things out of proportion.”
You check in with your body, and your heart is pounding. Your hands are sweating. You start tapping your foot really fast. You think about your partner again. You think about how you want to be in this relationship.
You want to get it right this time. You don’t know what to do and feel scared and confused.
Maybe it is time to stop running. You know you are going to have to face yourself at some point.
It’s safe to ask for help.
Any moment now, you’ll click the link for the call. It would be rude not to show up. “Ok, I guess I’m doing this. I don’t want to do this, but I will.”
Your heart feels like it’s going to pound out of your chest. You feel a little weak, take a deep breath, and you click the button to go into the virtual waiting room.
As the call connects, you see a smiling face. You can’t help but smile back.
Her face and voice are welcoming, “It’s good to see you…” You take as deep a breath as you can. You’re here; you showed up for yourself.
You’ve made the decision to show up.
You feel your body tense, and your anxiety spikes. You think, “I don’t think I can hold it together.”
You notice a soft, sincere smile and then hear the kind voice, “Let’s take a deep breath and give ourselves a minute to settle in and get used to this new experience…”
You chat a little bit about how this experience is for you. Your fears are listened to and acknowledged. You notice that she doesn’t think anything you’re saying is weird or abnormal.
You’re able to breathe a little deeper…
Now you begin to relax and feel safe.
Your heart is slowing, and your breathing becomes relaxed. You let out another deep breath. You haven’t been able to take that deep of a breath in a long time.
The level of comfort you feel here is unexpected. It feels good.
The voices in your head have quieted. You feel your whole body quieting down… Your inner voice says, “I am safe here. I can let go.”
This therapist seems comfortable in her own skin. You feel calm just being with her. Her smile is real, and her eyes are soft and gentle. She smiles and says, “I’m so glad you’re here. ”
No matter the problem, help is here, right now.
You’ve had successes in life. Maybe you are a college student trying to figure out what comes next.
Perhaps you are a single parent with work and family responsibilities, an entrepreneur with great business ideas, or a thinker who would like to get out of your head and into your heart.
Maybe you are the parent of a child who identifies as LGBTQIA+, and you would like to know how to navigate your own thoughts and emotions around what your child is experiencing. It may be that you identify as LGBTQIA+ and have found it challenging to find the right fit with a therapist or coach.
Change begins with you.
Whoever you are or however you identify yourself, you ‘intellectually’ know that you hold all the answers to your challenges – but you just can’t seem to find a way to access them.
You watch yourself making choices that you know won’t get you the results you want, but you continue to make them anyway.
You want to make a change, but then get so anxious just thinking about ‘it’ that you stop yourself from making even the tiniest step in any direction.
All you need is the right guide.
Would you like to have a skilled witness and guide to assist you in accessing your truth, even though you have some fear around what that truth might be?
If you see yourself in anything you’ve read here, then you’ve come to the right place at the right time.
Whether you’re in ‘a good place’ that you’d like to make even better or you struggle with thoughts and actions that sabotage what you truly want for your life, I have the life experience, skill, and the compassionate strength to stay with you on your journey.
Your life is waiting for you.
My clients seek guidance in managing their fearful and limiting thoughts and beliefs.
They seek guidance in connecting their mind with their body.
They want help to manage uncomfortable body sensations and emotions, especially because they feel anxious and overwhelmed and are tired of their repetitive reactions.
Are you ready to push the façade aside and feel more connected to your authentic self?
Individual therapy can help.
When it comes to anxiety and depression, my approach is to focus on addressing the root cause of the depression and anxiety. By going to the root of issues, rather than using band-aid strategies, symptoms resolve and inner freedom increases.
One framework I employ for resolving entrenched negative patterns is the cutting-edge NeuroAffective Relational Model, along with deep relaxation, visualization, mindful awareness, and other holistic, transpersonal and person-centered approaches. All modalities are designed to help you dis-identify from whatever underlies long-held patterns of anxiety and depression.
We may use Constellation Therapy to piece together timelines for family relationships and significant events. We may weave in narrative, myth, and ceremony, all of which are powerful as you reconnect with your authentic self.
Don’t put off what you know is best for you.
I have the experience, knowledge, training, and compassion to support the shifts necessary for creating a new way of being.
If you are still reading this, that means you are ready to stop the repetitive patterns of suffering you’ve experienced. You are ready to feel a safe, vibrant connection with yourself. You are ready to truly enjoy your relationship with yourself and those you love. The time is NOW to live the life you were born to live.
Give yourself a transformational opportunity.
Experience the physical and mental shifts that therapy with me makes available for you.
Don’t neglect your needs. Stop undermining yourself.
Call me today at (206) 779-2340 for a free phone consultation and learn why clients tell their friends and loved ones, “You really need to work with Laurel.”